The Social Media Trap

With the new fad job being an Instagram influencer, and celebrities' sharing more and more of their life on Instagram and twitter. Its become easier and easier to see the life of the rich and glamourous. While its cool seeing the day to day of your fav celeb or influencer, it can be dangerous for our well-being. And our pockets. I know I tend to get wrapped up in the idea that I need this or that. When really you don't NEED any of it. But the need to be like this person or that person is almost imbedded in us we don't even realize we're doing it. From buying the latest trends to shopping home decor. We strive to have our lives surrounded by all these items people have shared and suggested, that most of the time, cost a TON! Although I love these people, I follow for their families, I know that I can't afford a lot of these items that they post. Where some people can just scroll past saying to themselves "can't afford it" and move on. Others either do one of two things. One: buy it anyway to make themselves feel as though they can afford it, then put themselves into debt or don't pay a bill they needed to pay. Or two: dive into depressive thoughts about how they can't afford it and wish that they could and don't understand why they don't have a home or have clothes like these people do. I mean after all, they are just 'regular people' right?

And for the micro-influencer; why can't I just get brand deals like them? That plays into a big part in willing to pay the shipping cost or buying items at a discount.

Look, I'm just a stay at home mom, for me being on Instagram is something to do. If I can turn it into a living, that would be great! I've spoken on it before and for me it is something I have tried at for years. I admit, I didn't give it my best attempt. I was never in a place where I was willing or able to put the money out there to get my foot in the door. Which is really how you start. You HAVE to be willing to spend some money. And even now, I just never am willing or able too. That's where the 'being dangerous for your pocket' comes into play. I tell Brandon all the time, you have to be willing to spend some money, to start making money. He doesn't believe me. But why would a company be willing to support me if I'm not willing to support them? So unless you are willing to work hard and spend some money, or you have money/come from money and it isn't an issue for you. Then you can definitely do it!

It honestly isn't that I can't afford to do those things. Just a lot of the time our money goes else where or I just can't justify doing it. Like if its for a brand or boutique that is pricey or a place I would never personally shop at myself. I would never want to partner with a place that I would never buy from myself. I also tend to be really responsible when it comes to money most of the time. psssst: Its Brandon that's the spender lol. So for me I tend to fall under category 2. I dive into thoughts of why can't I just get these deals. Why can't I just have these things or buy these things when I want? But there is always a budget, always a plan or delegation of where the money goes before its even spent. I know it takes time. I know a lot of these influencers have spent YEARS building their names. But they also spent money too. And that's good for them! They deserve all the deals and things that come there way because they worked so hard on it! Of course, for some...it did come easier then others. But I do wish it wasn't always having to buy something in order to brand with someone.

Now, do I envy some of these people? Most of these people? Okay, yes. I am 100% guilty of doing it. But I don't let it discourage me anymore. In the past I probably would have given up by now. Gotten lazy, and at times I still am. Or simply just gotten too sad that it wasn't happening fast enough/going my way. This time, I'm looking at it more as an outlet for me. It's something for me to be free at. To express myself and be able to do something other then, well, Mom. It's also a great way to show the world what a wonderful, bright joyful little girl Mirabella is.

I try really hard to not fall into those thoughts though. To not let Instagram trap me into thinking that something is wrong with me or my life because I can't just buy all this stuff right when I want to buy it. Everything takes time. And even if that time never comes, that's okay! Budgeting is good. It's never a bad thing to be responsible.

Although I do this for the time being and I do feel my real career or job is working with animals. I would love to be a real influencer one day. I enjoy creating and sharing with everyone. It's great to connect with new people and make new friends. Even if they are just online! Online friends are fun!

For now I'm happy just being a mirco-influencer. At least I like to think I am anyways! I hope I am able to educate on down syndrome and my shopping finds are helpful for everyone. Sometimes I do feel like not a single person cares and I'm more annoying then I am helpful. But I do get some random messages of encouragement and it makes me not want to give up! I have enjoyed writing again as well! Whether it's just writing out my thoughts or a thoughtful message to my daughter or spouse for a post. Its been nice expressing myself through words again. I'm thankful for social media in a way as well I guess.

It sometimes isn't always a trap.

It can sometimes be an outlet.

So take it in, in strides. When you start to feel yourself falling into the black hole of depressive thoughts or you realized you swiped up one too many times and now you can't pay your phone bill. Take a break. Take a step back and remember, one who you are. and two, you don't have to be like them. You are you. And they are them. And there just isn't anything you can do about it. You have no idea what goes on behind the scenes, no idea where or how they got to where they are. Your story isn't their story. I gotta keep telling myself that. Because one day my story, our story will be known and it will be from real hard work.

I look at Brandons cousin, Ashley Beary and I am definitely inspired by her. The idea of influencing was always there but meeting Brandon and being introduced to someone who has really worked hard for years, only kicked me in the butt to actually do it! She post a lot of small business shops and really does show affordable, relatable content. And she has spent a lot of time and hard work getting to where she is at. And she only continues to do so. I'm so blessed that she is apart of Mirabellas life and can be a great role model for her!

Dani Austin is the influencer I most watch, I do believe that she came from money, I could be wrong though, so becoming what she is now came much easier for her. But she also started years ago, way before Instagram even started and talks a lot about how her and her mom would plan outfits and take pictures. Regardless if you have the money to purchase these items. It still takes time and hard work to put the content together. But, once again you HAVE to spend the money to have content to create.

I know she is now a millionaire so I can't really look at too many things she post because it will send me into that spiral of why can't I buy this stuff? lol But her story still inspires me.

Social media is either dangerous or inspiring. And you really gotta be careful which one it does for you. Lately its been dangerous for me. I'm lucky I am able to realize that though and when I need o take a step back and clear my mind. I hope you can do the same and not fall into the TRAP social media can create sometimes.

On that social media topic though: Follow me on Instagram please! @elizabilfeld lol